Archive for the ‘OJ Simpson’ Category

OJ Simpson Visits Rush’s Superfund Site

December 6, 2008

20070623-oj_if_i_did_it1Now,  it can be told…Rush Limbaugh has pocketed the millions spent by the govt. to clean up his own mouth-caused Superfund site.  And he thinks he deserves the dough on accouta having a large and loyal audience.

Whence loyal audiences?  Dog pounds for one.  They never question, though they can sometimes be vicious if the wrong one is selected out.

Large audiences?

OJ had a very happy huge audience the other day, mandating a serious payout, but as normal, OJ played his Vegas-dealt hand all wrong.  If you get up to speak, you don’t do it for five or ten minutes.

Blab on, and on, blab some more…”it all started, your honor, when I was in my mother’s womb…I believe it was a Friday…” and then just keep talking.

They say the reason that during a police pursuit, the suspect’s car doesn’t pull over right away is the suspect realizes for every second he’s out driving, is another second he’s not in the slam.

Same deal for OJ.  Every minute blabbing about this and that, that and this, childhood, friends, friend’s childhoods, children’s friends, property, cops, judges, lawyers, golf, search for murderers, the golddiggers – his term – murder victims and murders, kidnappers and pistol packing partners, sports collectors, Hertz dealers and everything else that crosses his excuse for a mind is another minute he doesn’t have to spend in the slam.

By speaking for five minutes, he wasn’t behind those bars for those very five minutes.  Had he talked for hours, days, months….you get the idea…a continuous block of word-like sounds…and who would want to shut him up? The jduge?  An instant mistrial.  He would be spending all of those minutes not in a cell…and spend enough time yakking away and in about 16 years, you’ve done your time and never left the courtroom.

Sort of like Congress on a good fillibuster day without the politcal edge.  But nooo, he had to let it go after five minutes.

Which Rush will never do, letting nary an inane comment wane away unbroached, earning him a Superfund Man of the Year citation.

OJ?  Super fiend of the year and that was his best year, when he was a killing machine, which broke down on the first floor of a seedy Vegas hotel stopping him in his relentless search for the “real killer.”

And how will he spend his NFL pension in the slam?  Once it gets banked, do the Goldmans get the proceeds from the account?